Advice on children

[Ezram]

If a child (10-11 years old) comes to you with a question that their parents would normally answer, what do you do?

[Crafty_Alex]

I would refer them to the parents. If the parents aren't/haven't been telling their kid something, it's not really not my place to tell their kid, either.

[Mister Andersen]

What, out of curiosity, was the question?

[glimmerrat]

I'm a teacher - I get that all the time. What's the context in which you were asked? Why did they ask you?

[spinningdice]

Refer to parents, if practical - but I won't lie to children.

[Wolverine]

I often make up something humerous that won't get the kid into trouble - unless it's something really serious.

I take the opinion that if the kid is coming to me for advice then they have much bigger problems.

[Agent 333]

First, I ask them how old they are, if I think they're old enough to know the answer, I'll tell em. If they're too young I'll tell them to ask their parents. It's worked out pretty well so far.

[Ezram]

Well, he came to me asking why certain people of different cultures fight with eachother (outward observations like skin color and language).

[Krensky]

The appropriate answer for that question from a ten year old is:

Because they're stupid.

[TheTSKoala]

The appropriate answer for that question from a ten year old is:

Because they're stupid.

...and it's not like that's a lie either.

[Ezram]

Whatever happens, i'm glad I was presented with the opportunity to help someone along to becoming a good person.

[Gentry]

Well, he came to me asking why certain people of different cultures fight with eachother (outward observations like skin color and language).

Krensky and TSK certainly have the correct answer.  I just wanted to add that to my mind this particular question is one that any child should be able to ask any adult.  So Ezram, as far as I'm concerned you needn't feel uncomfortable at having been asked such a question. 

Questions like "where do babies come from?" are the ones you refer back to parents.   

[Ezram]

I suppose so. I was just concered because his parents are somewhat oversensitive.

[glimmerrat]

In this case his parents don't matter. Right is right and wrong is wrong, whether they're good parents or mindless bigots who deserve to be punched in the neck until they die.

[Gentry]

Heh.  True, if blunt. 

As much as I loathe all the "it takes a village" nonsense, I think children tend to be done a disservice by being fobbed back to their parents.  One of the hardest things any child learns is who they can and can't trust for straight answers.  If they're asking someone other than their parents a question, it's because they feel on some level that they can't ask their parents.  It's sad, but there it is anyway.

That said, we as adults need to be careful how we answer the questions of children.  I find it very helpful to ask questions back to the child first to establish A) what he's actually asking, since he may not be sure how to frame his real question, and B) what he already thinks about it.  Once you've got those things dialed in, you can calmly (and briefly) answer. 

And keep it brief, for the love of heaven.  If the kid's got more questions, he'll ask.  You don't need to give him the full treatment.