GENERALIZED OCCUPATIONAL APTITUDE TESTFinding your future is easy!Question 1You begin work as an intern with the reactor technician, when one day the technician turns up to work with odd growth on the side of his neck. What do you do?
• 1 Steal a handgun from the armoury and put the poor man out of his misery.
• 2 Persuade him to seek medical attention immediately.
• 3 Amputate the growth with a pair of tin shears and soldering gun.
• 4 Say nothing, and study the growth as it gradually gets bigger.
Question 2Your teacher gave you an ‘F’ and you want revenge! You sneak into the classroom at night and…
• 1 Write horrible things about him on the blackboard.
• 2 Spread glue on his chair.
• 3 Replace his aspirins with oestrogen pills.
• 4 Tighten the spring on the door so that when it opens, it’ll spring back and whack him!
Question 3You are approached by a panicked scientist, who yells “Quick! The quantum oscillation chamber is about to overload and emit a resonance cascade!” What’s your response?
• 1 Club him over the head with a frozen ration pack and arrest him.
• 2 “We need to stabilize the brownian inverters! Back to the lab!”
• 3 Pretend the Overseer is coming, then slip away whilst he is distracted.
• 4 Yell for help.
Question 4Your mother asks you to help her prepare dinner for the family. What do you do?
• 1 Gladly help!
• 2 Point out to her how the recipe could be improved.
• 3 Tinker with the oven, so that everything is cooked in half the time.
• 4 Slink off to meet your friends when she’s not looking.
Question 5Your dear sweet Granny asks you to steal extra rations for her. What do you do?
• 1 Obey your elder and steal the rations.
• 2 Explain to her why she doesn’t need the extra rations.
• 3 Distract her with something shiny until she forgets about the rations.
• 4 Lock Granny in her room – for her own good.
Question 6Your little brother can’t sleep, as he thinks that ‘monsters’ will get him. What do you do?
• 1 Stand guard outside his door, to see off any monsters.
• 2 Equip him with a can of raid and a lighter, then leave.
• 3 Give him a hug and tell him that there’s no such thing as monsters.
• 4 Laugh, and tell him that you’re going to unlock the door and let the monsters in after he’s gone to sleep.
Question 7The Overseer, in his wisdom, has seen fit to start a number of sports teams. Which sport do you choose?
• 1 Basketball
• 2 Table Tennis
• 3 Boxing
• 4 Pip-Boy Pong
Question 8The vault commissary holds a copy of Grognak the Barbarian #1. You want it. What’s the best way to get it?
• 1 Steal the comic book at the earliest opportunity.
• 2 Trade the comic book for something of equal value.
• 3 Walk into the commissary with a meat cleaver and demand it, on pain of death!
• 4 Add laxatives to the store owner’s Nuka-Cola, then take the comic book while he’s on the can.
Question 9You come across a group of older children bullying your neighbour’s son. What do you do?
• 1 Insult them until they bully you instead.
• 2 Threaten to call security.
• 3 Roll up your sleeves and beat the crap out of them!
• 4 Talk them down, explaining to them the consequences of their actions.
Question 10Who is indisputably the most important person in the vault: he who shelters us from the harshness of the atomic wasteland, and to whom we owe everything we have, including our lives?
• 1 The Overseer
• 2 The Overseer
• 3 The Overseer
• 4 The Overseer
This concludes the test. Please send your results to glimmerrat via the Vault-Tec ‘personal message’ option on your Pip-Boy. Your results will be posted on the notice board outside the classroom as soon as all results are in.
Good luck!
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