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Author Topic: [Humor] Campaign Qualities to Avoid?  (Read 35328 times)
TheAuldGrump
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« on: January 18, 2008, 12:49:27 AM »

Musical (+0 XP): Sometimes it seems as though the missions exist merely as backdrops for the music. All special characters can gain an Action Die by participating in a musical number by singing, narration, or supporting accompaniment (instrumental, or vocal)  - friend and foe alike. Dice gained must be used during the current scene, and are lost when the scene ends or the music is allowed to stop. Any special character can spend an Action Die to end the music without the other participants losing the Action Die. No more than one Action Die may be earned by any one character for the duration of the song.

Next?

The Auld Grump
« Last Edit: January 18, 2008, 04:35:47 PM by TheAuldGrump » Logged

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Bill Whitmore
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« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2008, 02:39:37 AM »

Red Shirt (+0 XP):  Any attack made against a special character that scores a threat, is automatically upgraded to a critical hit; however, the attack is considered to have hit the closest standard NPC within CQB range of the target and allied with the target, instead of the targeted character.  Also, when any special NPC is required to make a saving throw, he may substitute any allied stanard NPC within CQB range to make the save instead.  In either case, if there are no standard NPCs within CQB range, this quality is ignored.

"Watch out, Captain!"

Those were the last words of Red Shirt 00392, as he pushed his captain to safety, but died in the fiery explosion to follow.
« Last Edit: January 18, 2008, 12:38:48 PM by Bill Whitmore » Logged

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Gentry
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« Reply #2 on: January 18, 2008, 06:25:56 AM »

Subtitled (+0 XP):  All players must speak a foreign language at the table, writing their english dialogue and holding it up for the rest of the table to read.  If a player does not speak a foreign language, he must at least speak gibberish, observing the writing and display of his lines as stated.

If the language spoken by the player does not match any of the cultures foci possessed by his character, he must drop every third word from his written dialogue, and is not allowed to use correct pronouns.
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spinningdice
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« Reply #3 on: January 18, 2008, 07:56:25 AM »

I actually quite like Redshirt as a quality (perhaps with a little work) - might make an amusing feat.
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TheTSKoala
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« Reply #4 on: January 18, 2008, 08:09:57 AM »

Directed by Uwe Boll:  Whenever a player scores a threat, that threat is automatically downgraded to a critical failure.  During every scene, whenever a player makes a roll, flip a coin.  Heads, that roll is -10.  Tails, that roll is considered to have scored a threat.  Once per session, players may spend 1 Action Die, after suffering a critical failure,  to violently assault the GC without fear of legal ramifications.  (Honestly, who wouldn't punch Uwe Boll in the face if they met him?)

I think that fittingly describes a play session with Uwe Boll....
« Last Edit: January 18, 2008, 08:21:54 AM by TheTSKoala » Logged
Krensky
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« Reply #5 on: January 18, 2008, 09:58:33 AM »

Control is Your Friend (+0 XP): Don't worry, this will be fun. Control says so, and Control is your friend. Can you doubt Control? Doubting Control is treason. Trust Control. At the beginning of each scene every player may spend one action die. If they can not or do not they are considered to be in a Terminal Situation the entire scene. If the GC or another player uses this to kill your character in a boring way he owes you an Action Die and a cookie.
« Last Edit: January 19, 2008, 12:35:41 AM by Krensky » Logged

We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming. - Werner von Braun
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There's no upside in screwing with things you can't explain. - Captain Roy Montgomery
Forcegypsy
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« Reply #6 on: January 18, 2008, 12:21:57 PM »

This thread, given time and some qualities has Classic potential written all over it... *wanders off to craft some goodies*
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Cha togar m' fhearg gun džoladh.
Krensky
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« Reply #7 on: January 18, 2008, 12:45:58 PM »

Control is Your Friend (+0 XP): Don't worry, this will be fun. Control says so, and Control is your friend. Can you doubt Control? Doubting Control is treason. At the begining of each scene every player may spend one action die. If they can not or do not they are considered to be in a Terminal Situation the entire scene. If the GC uses this to kill your character in a boring way he owes you an Action Die and a cookie.

As an additional note, this quality is somewhat serious... Here's my take on qualities for ParanoiaCraft:

Bleak, Bloodbath, Bottomless Clip, Comedy of Errors, Control is Your Friend, Faction, Fast Attributes, Fast Feats, Fast Growth, Fast Interests, Fast Proficiencies, Gritty, Paranoid, Rare Spectacle, Revolving Door, Shoe String Budget, Small Screen, Tense.

All the Fast qualities are to counter the massive agent body counts brought on by the qualities and proper play of this style. Smiley

« Last Edit: January 18, 2008, 01:07:07 PM by Krensky » Logged

We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming. - Werner von Braun
Right now you have no idea how lucky you are that I am not a sociopath. - A sign seen above my desk.
There's no upside in screwing with things you can't explain. - Captain Roy Montgomery
TheTSKoala
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« Reply #8 on: January 18, 2008, 12:56:45 PM »

Corporate Sponsored:  Each player gains +1 to their wealth & spending cash.  Every scene, each player must in some way incorporate or use the slogan or product of a major corporate entity.  If they do not, that player's wealth & spending cash are -5 from various corporate lawsuits for breach of contract / marketing.
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Chimera
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« Reply #9 on: January 18, 2008, 01:11:13 PM »

Scooby Doobie Doo (+0 Xp) The mastermind has access to a plethora of exotic gear picks but is doomed to an ultimate downfall due to basic snares and cheap rubber masks.  The PCs gain a +2 to all Investigation and Search Checks involving secret passages or food and there must be at least one animal companion that communicates clearly with one of the PCs through "enhanced awareness".  The chosen PC gets a +2 Awareness  and a +2 to Sense Motive whenever interacting with the animal companion.
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Forcegypsy
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« Reply #10 on: January 18, 2008, 01:16:21 PM »

Deja Vu (-50xp, Scene Only): In the event of a total cock-up during a session, a player may spend 2 AD to have his agent wake up from a dream. Rewind and replay the scene, no experience is gained by the team for the original 'dream sequence'.
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Cha togar m' fhearg gun džoladh.
TheAuldGrump
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« Reply #11 on: January 18, 2008, 04:34:46 PM »

Subtitled (+0 XP):  All players must speak a foreign language at the table, writing their english dialogue and holding it up for the rest of the table to read.  If a player does not speak a foreign language, he must at least speak gibberish, observing the writing and display of his lines as stated.

If the language spoken by the player does not match any of the cultures foci possessed by his character, he must drop every third word from his written dialogue, and is not allowed to use correct pronouns.
Alternately, if the Historical Quality is also in use the characters must remain silent, though they are allowed to greatly exaggerate both gestures and facial expressions or silently mouth the words of their dialog, pausing whenever someone else is holding up a dialog box.

The Auld Grump
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I don't know how the story ends...
But I do know what happens next.
TheAuldGrump
Control
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Because The Cat Told Me To...


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« Reply #12 on: January 18, 2008, 04:44:51 PM »

Control Bribery (Variable XP, Seasons only):
The quickest way to a Game Control's heart is though his stomach. By sacrificing foodstuffs and drink to the Man Behind the Screen player Special Characters can gain a variable amount of Action Dice and Experience Points as determined arbitrarily by the GC.

'What?! This pizza has anchovies! DIE!' - Game Control Walter Permagaur to player that chose poorly in the toppings of his sacrifice.
« Last Edit: January 18, 2008, 04:47:26 PM by TheAuldGrump » Logged

I don't know how the story ends...
But I do know what happens next.
Bill Whitmore
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Control
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« Reply #13 on: January 18, 2008, 04:52:35 PM »

CINEMATIC ACTION CAMERA! (+0 XP): During any scene involving combat or a chase the cameraman has an epileptic seizure and the camera begins to shake uncontrollably.  Since it is now impossible to actually see what is going on, a -10 penalty is applied to all Notice and Search checks.  In addition, at the end of every round, all participants in the the combat or chase must make a Fortitude save starting with a DC of 10 the first round and increasing by 1 every round the combat or chase continues or become Nauseated.
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Don't follow your passion.  Take it with you.

ALL HAIL THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER!   Ramen.
Krensky
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WWTWD?


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« Reply #14 on: January 18, 2008, 04:54:12 PM »

Subtitled (+0 XP):  All players must speak a foreign language at the table, writing their english dialogue and holding it up for the rest of the table to read.  If a player does not speak a foreign language, he must at least speak gibberish, observing the writing and display of his lines as stated.

If the language spoken by the player does not match any of the cultures foci possessed by his character, he must drop every third word from his written dialogue, and is not allowed to use correct pronouns.
Alternately, if the Historical Quality is also in use the characters must remain silent, though they are allowed to greatly exaggerate both gestures and facial expressions or silently mouth the words of their dialog, pausing whenever someone else is holding up a dialog box.

The Auld Grump

The GC must, however, have a little old lady sitting in the corner playing the score on a piano.
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We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming. - Werner von Braun
Right now you have no idea how lucky you are that I am not a sociopath. - A sign seen above my desk.
There's no upside in screwing with things you can't explain. - Captain Roy Montgomery
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