Just returned from Jupiter Ascending
. Fair warning: I like mediocre action movies.
On the whole I enjoyed it for exactly the reasons I expected to - a lavish production and some really gorgeous presentation of (technologically) advanced civilization. And on the whole I liked that the advanced humans were for the most part barbarous assholes. I liked them because they weren't apologetic about it.
Its a good romp, and one that if you watch it later in your own home you probably won't have to mute it to enjoy it. The action mostly wins out over the obvious young adult fiction vibe (how I despise young adult fiction) though sadly its of the particularly grating subset of supposed girl power... only her power is strictly because she's (so) special
rather than any active contribution she makes. That's right, her principle power is that strong guys lust after her. Sigh. Like I said, I was mostly there to look at the FX.
I literally have no idea what they were trying to tell me with her being the daughter of an astrophysicist and a mathematician. There was no pay off there, and the only pay off of her working as a housekeeper was a couple of really lame toilet jokes. And I really don't see how her mother goes from being an established math professor to housekeeper. Do you actually have to make someone a menial laborer to get blatant class war with newly discovered family who rule multiple worlds each? Does anyone reading this think the Walton heirs live in the same world as the rest of us? If anything it would have been funnier to see an Earther CEO find out how incredibly quaint their vast financial empire is by the standards of interstellar society. But it doesn't set up toilet humor, so I guess go with Cinderella.
Sadly like most movies I find the third act really forced and painful, which is sad because I actually LIKE the principle villain but...
...For FUCK'S SAKE when are we going to see a movie where somebody -- anybody -- states the GODDAMN OBVIOUS that giving over all power to a badguy holding hostages doesn't make the hostages ANY SAFER. The captors have already proven themselves honorless monsters. There's no deal to be made here. Zero. None. Finito. You are the one in the position of power. That's why they're pulling asshat stunts in the first place. In this case she's standing next to a SPACE COP. "Hi, I'd like to file a complaint under section 45-b of the code I studied earlier in the film: the former title holder of my planet has removed valuable assets from my world after the transfer. Please retrieve my goods. With prejudice."
Oh, and nobody who expects to live for upwards of 50,000 years builds a facility at the bottom of the solar system's second deepest gravity well that explodes
when you bounce a pebble off of it. We're talking our
solar system - the one absolutely awash with falling rocks.
Part of me was left wondering... Given the Wachowski brothers penchant for skimming millions of off movie-goers its easy to see why they write stories where the entire populace of the Earth is nothing more than livestock being farmed by more capable beings, but do you think they are consciously aware
of how repetitive they are